The world has been so heavy lately. I find myself trying to balance my awareness with covid-19, and not obsessively checking my phone for updates on the virus. I feel like this year has been so incredibly difficult with events that have taken place in my personal life, to the bigger impact the world has been suffering with. So much division and pain, and not enough loving each other. I try not to make my blog political- so I won’t. Just a simple thought- be the love people need.
No smooth transition here, but onto other news!
I turn 24 next month and I have been spending the last few weeks reflecting and journaling about this past year. There has been a lot of heart ache, things that I am not ready to write about. But I think it is important to be honest. Life is messy, and there is comfort when we are honest with ourselves and others. The honesty I am able to write about is just how fucking hard this year has been. And I think more importantly I wanted to share this with my readers; it gets better. Such a simple phrase, one that times I was livid to hear. “it gets better”. The pain doesn’t feel like it will ever ease from your heart, but slowly, in little ways it does. That is healing. I have learned the distinct feeling of healing this year. Less anger and sadness, and more wholeness in my heart. I just think that is the honesty I am able to give anyone who is hurting. IT GETS BETTER. Everyone deserves to heal, and I am ready for this next year of good things.
23 has been the year of so many things for me. The year I got bangs (oh you guys didn’t already know? I write about them so often you would think they are my most redeeming personality trait). This was the year that I decided to take a step back from college to refocus on my goals. A HEALTHY CHOICE! 23 was the year that I finally decided I was responsible enough to have all white bedding. Which means yes! I did stop eating and drinking in bed. Quite adulty of me, I know. I re-devoted myself to my writing, which is a choice I hope to make over and over again throughout my life as needed. Starting over is something I have practiced so many times during age 23. This was a year of re-devotion. I also found a deep connection to the song “Unwritten” by Natasha Bedingfield, which is hilarious because I also felt a deep connection to that song when I was 13. Ten-year difference and I still love a good melodramatic song. I hope when I am 33 I still find the same love for the song. I listen to it in my car when I need a little pick me up. I have a whole playlist of songs that get my heart happy. In my phone the playlist title is “happy-glowing music”, and I am firm believer that everyone needs one of those playlists that has all the songs that uplift your soul. This year, some of the songs that made it into my playlist are:
What the World Needs Now Is Love by Andra Day
Respect by Aretha Franklin
I Love a Rainy Night by Eddie Rabbit
Landslide by Fleetwood Mac
Nights by Frank Ocean
Closer to Fine by the Indigo Girls
Dancing in the Moonlight by King Harvest
Sunday Morning by Maroon 5
You Can Call Me Al by Paul Simon
Snow by Red Hot Chili Peppers
Santeria by Sublime
Worn Out by Ziggy Alberts
AND SO MANY MORE but I don’t want to list my entire song list for sake of not boring my readers, and because I like to keep a mystery about me- ya know? (jokes) But I do think that the songs that I listed have been the playlist to 23. I blasted those songs in my car whenever I needed to feel better. Music helps with healing! So do long car rides where you cry/laugh/scream the lyrics with your whole heart. That is just one of the facts of life. Everyone needs time in their car to listen to their happy-glowing playlist. If anyone is interested in the rest of my playlist- reach out to me in the comments, or on social media and I can get you a copy of that bad boy! It is chock full of happiness. Or so I think. Also, with everyone needing to practice social distancing while we quarantine to help slow the spread of the coronavirus, enjoy art! Music, podcasts, poetry, movies, etc! All the good things to help you feel less isolated. I have been watching the show Fleabag and it is hilarious. I highly recommend it to anyone with a dry sense of humor. It is full of laughs.
I hope everyone stays healthy and feels the love that is out there in the world!
Libby Anne Groseclose